Getting ready to slay for the next two years
by Sukhi
The two year plan isn't new. I started thinking about it a long time ago. I dreamed of changing myself and continued to visualize it throughout my life. I kept adapting to the world around me. I survived but experienced even the happiest moments of my life in pain. My choices and behavior held me back. I saw the world through a fog, and ran after people who hurt me. Until yesterday, I was bogged down by my attachment to them. I didn't do anything for myself. I didn't stick up for myself. To be my best self, I needed more time, and I needed them. I needed help, I needed support. I cried a lot. I would cry for my mom. I put everything off. I regret not living my life and begging to be in their lives. I am very embarrassed.
I learned how to push websites to the internet so I made this blog. I am now saving myself and fixing my world. I care so much about myself and I want to be well. I want to get rid of the bad feelings and my bad life so I made the two year plan to take me out of the horror of my misery. A soul cleanse is a tall order so the fixed point of time at which this work will be evaluated is two years in the future. I am giving myself two years to get over everything which has happened to me.
June 2020 - June 2022
Plain and simple I want a better life. I want people to stop fucking with me. My number one goal at the end of this project will be to have a better reputation.
At present, it's five or six days before I start this and I am resting. I am fried from my life, the experiences and relationships I have experienced. This is not what I am shooting for. I spent last week developing programming for the immediate future and on calendaring efforts. For the next few days til June I'm going to be resting and practicing the programming. It's a soft launch, my soft opening. Here I go. The last thing I want to say is: This is your warning.